The Dream Lives On...

...crushed and crumpled, fantatical in spurts, bleary-eyed, bitingly sardonic, congested, manic, eaten by ants, less prone to fits of sizzling brilliance, more friendly than before but just as tired, fitter, happier (not) more productive, wanderingstu.com today celebrates its

ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY

It all started on June 30, 2005, with these mildly prophetic words (click the link).

Wow. One hundred and ten entries in a year. More than twice a week. Praise the Lord. And thank you, dear friends, whose readership and support has made this effort worthwhile (both of you). Never one to let down the team, I would say I have done my part in making this year of wanderingstu as turbulent, witty, indecisive, confusing, thrilling and juicy as possible. All that without even touching on the winter's excursion into heartbreak.

In the past year we've protested against the withdrawal from Gaza, found holiness in Rotterdam, danced like Michael Jackson, obsessed about Craig B., quit Reform Rabbinic School, tried to escape Yeshiva, fled to Egypt, cuddled babies, planted flowers, run into Cate Blanchett, scared Southern women, lied about a date with a hot French girl, cussed, bitched, complained and cried, said nice things about my dad and been solicited for easy online college degrees.

So there it is. Looking back, I have to admit that it's the longest consistent effort of productivity and creativity in my life. Thank God. Let's keep it up-- (and I do mean "let's." Your comments are the gas in wanderingstu's engine).

Right now it's 6pm, things are mellow here in the West Bank, although we are technically in the midst of a national crisis. Esta is in Boston with Burt and Marion, and will be hanging out with the Blindermen sometime soon. And you, my friend, you are out there somewhere, living your life, doing your thing, hopefully thinking of me.

Drop a line!
Here's to another great year-- an even better one--- less confusion, more JOY!!!
Baruch Hashem, haTov uMeitiv
(Blessed is the Good Lord Almighty, He is Good, and He makes things gooder)

Shabbat Shalom.

i meant what i said but didn't mean to mean what i meant

i'll apologize for my previous statement. especially after reading some recent stuff from you guys, and realizing how many of you make valid points.

of note are recent comments by Yitzi Jacob and the new Jen Berkowitz.

when i posted this morning i was grouchy and something i saw or heard or thought hit a nerve and i was thinking about people i talk to in real life as well and i was exaggerating because my mood was crap and there is some truth in what i say but on the other hand it is all bull.

but fer cryin' out loud-- don't quit commenting on the blog just because i insulted you-- hell, that roughStuTalk is what you all keep comin' back for.

and like i said, it's all in love love love.

here's the other side of me-- rocking the chuppah at the wedding last week. i was the MC. with finesse




also, two of the greatest people in my universe... Shaul David Judelman and Avraham Eliezer Tertes. both in America right now-- come home soon!!!!


pics-- thanks to Dan Mobius, the Jack of Jewschool, the OrthodoxAnarchist

take no prisoners

a few years ago, in some club in New York f''n' City, Screamin' Scotty Throttle (craig's brother) of defunct punk outfit the N.Y. Wrecks, declared war on rock n' roll before a crowd of at least fifteen. I was not actually there, but I was privy to the battle plans before the formal offensive began. After this declaration, he proceeded to rock out like a mofo.

Today, I feel like declaring war on God. I mean, what's this Guy's problem? Someone's got to stop Him, and I'm gonna try my best, between now and 8:30, when it will be time for the evening prayer.

__________________________
by the way. i love the love, but you're all missing the point. except maybe shaul

a room with a view

or is it "a view to a kill"
?

here's what's out my front window this afternoon. the odd thing is that it doesn't strike me as odd at all, until i stop to think about it.



















on the other side of the life/death coin, here's Michah Adam Levin, hours before he joined Nechama Shayna Langer in most Holy Matrimony (Kiddushin).















And this, of course, is Pesach Ben Tzion-- known to many as child star Zac Bennett, whose appearance on Miami Vice as "the kid" wowed American television audiences coast-to-coast. Have a great Shabbes and a pleasant weekend

shine on

Here's me, about 2 weeks ago, a special Shabbat thingie we did for a bunch of Ethiopian families at a Merkaz Klitah (immigrant absorption center) in Ashkelon. Mostly we played with the kids, but also prayed and sang and danced with the men a bit. This is me recreating my famous role as "The Sun," one of the main characters in the ongoing drama of "God's Creation."

What is the real nature and function of the wanderingstu family of weblogs?

It seems like most wanderingstu posts are cute, happy, fun, or, if at all negative, then mildly sad, or a little cheeky and bitter, but not outright outrageously blue. Why do I keep this space so sanitized? Some thoughts

• to protect you, gentle reader
• just in case those people with that amazing job offer pop over here
• so that some girl I like doesn't realize how screwed up I am
• to avoid an influx of well-intentioned but cloyingly affirming advice
• so that her lawyers don't find out the truth

but I'm not on the job market, all the girls I know are aware of my insanity, I can always erase your comments if they are too sickly-sweet.......... so what am I afraid of?

So here you go--

Maybe I'm not interested in anything anymore. I fall asleep in class. And when I am not falling asleep, I am wondering why I am listening to this stuff. It happened at HUC as well, so don't try to pull that card. I used to (I think) be excited about Jewish stuff, about the words of the prophets, about the prospect of learning these texts real good and being able to use them homiletically, about the radical message of interresponsibility to be found in the Bible, about the question of the human soul, about myth and truth and destiny and symbology, about all kinds of things.

I used to sit in my room (in the early-mid 80s) and play with Smurfs and Star Wars figures and GI Joe and have epic adventures that lasted hours, days, weeks-- all-consuming. I did have a brief phase of lego obsession about 2 1/2 years ago, but even then it was buying them and not creating with them. I get all-consumed over a woman now and again, as many of you may know. I love Vietnamese noodle soup and karaoke....

But I fall asleep in class. And even when I don't fall asleep, I don't know that I give a shit -- pardon my language-- that I give a rat's ass about any of it for more than an hour or two at a time. I kinda don't want to do anything. I mean, there's things I want to want to do, like the Yoga I am supposed to be doing right now, according to my schedule. But there's nothing I really want to do. (well, almost)

And that's a big problem. It ain't about "being hard on myself," it's about doing anything in this world. How can one do if one is bleh? (don't answer)

anyway.
___________
Jeffrey Weill just called and invited me to join his family on a little Dead Sea vacation this weekend. That would be nice. They just had a bris for their new kid, Sammy Emmett, whose name in hebrew, Shmuel Emet, means Sammy Truth.

wicked.

It only takes one to kill

These Israeli mosquitos, or at least the West Bank version, are slippery, In America, mosquitos are easy marks; full of themselves, sluggish from too much grease-laden blood, sure of their own invulnerability. In Romania, they are stoics. Perhaps they care not for life at all, or perhaps they are so bewildered by the non-sense of life in the post-Communist era that they don't bother to try to escape the whipping washcloth that comes to seal their fate. These Israeli pests, on the other hand, are evasive. And it only takes one to buzz in your ear all night and leave your arms all welted by morning. Thus is the scenario for tonight.

Is using a phrase like "on the other hand" okay, or a sign of mediocre writing?

It is closing in on midnight. Since Shabbat, I have used the toilet, stood half-naked under the clear starry sky and smoked half a cigarette, looked at my plunging stock portfolio, paid my car insurance debt, taken some vitamins, check my email.

Yeah.

thinking, writing, thinking

here's a nice sentence I wrote almost 8 years ago, in Beer Sheva, as part of a story that I never finished:

. There is no wandering here, just endless iterations of the pageantry of routine.

Sometime in early June I finished a piece of fiction for the first time in over a decade. It's a story called "thirty-one." I reckon that's a good achievement.

Connectivity Issues

I can't connect very well. So I haven't been blogging much. I want to post a lot of pictures, but I just don't seem to be onthe right wavelength. I seem to be in the middle of a lot of mixed signals, and dream of being able to raise the bar and really just send (and receive) a clear message. I have to get into all sorts of weird places and strange positions just to connect a little bit, and even then my connection is undependable, often weak, lost in the ether...

the metaphor died.

in a world of great connectivity, wanderingstu.com is a brilliantly updated and vividly illustrated blog, and wanderingstu is brilliant, vivid and illustrious.

someone plug me in

Send money-- fast

I've been lying to you all.

The truth is that I am homeless, on the streets of Brooklyn, and using the computer at the library to create this veneer of religious fanaticism and material okay-ness. Check out lisawhiteman.com for more info. (Click on "the follower")

Big Birthday for Nasty Le

Today is 9 Sivan, the birthday of Leo (Leon) Ariel Elisha Rosen, perhaps the greatest man in all of Israel. He's the most religiously fanatical Reform Jew and the most heretical Haredi you've ever met. He's a jazz stylist, a clown prince of comedy, a post-modern prophet, and an absolute lunatic. He gave me the only birthday blessing to ever utilize the word "decontextualist."

I love the guy, and wish him the best this year, in love, music, Torah and ca$h flow.

these are old pics. he's much mo'betta these days

I don't know your phone number

That's one reason why I haven't called you. When I lost my phone, all the numbers went away. I have a new phone, but not the numbers. That's one reason why I haven't called you.

There may be other reasons.